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The Beauty of Rest

Fight-Flight To Rest-Repair

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Summary: In her reflection on relaxation, the author admits to neglecting it after her blood pressure normalised. Recognising the historical significance of rest in healing, she aims to reintroduce relaxation into her daily routine. Despite feeling guilty, she acknowledges the necessity of rest for transitioning her body from fight-flight to rest-repair for her healing journey.

I’m calling myself out! You see, when I wrote my post on ‘High Blood Pressure’, I said that I was going to start resting properly. I promise I did start doing that. I was doing my good solid 30 minutes of re-lax-ation. But I then found out my blood pressure was back to normal so the rest stopped too. But shouldn’t I still be doing this? Don’t my mind and body deserve this? Don’t we all deserve this, sick or not?!

Relaxation In Ancient Times

In Ancient Greece, an important part of a healing journey was the act of leaving your normal environment in order to seek out a sanctuary for rest and recuperation. Similarly, in Victorian times, it was considered standard practice to spend time by the sea or in a spa or bath house to restore oneself. What has happened to this today? Life today is too focused on being rushed and hurried, being productive and conquering to-do lists.

I am choosing to take a quarter-turn (perhaps more!) away from my to-do list. I’m starting to choose to sit in the sun (topping up my Vitamin D as I do so) or read a few more pages of that novel.

The Need For Rest

In today’s particularly hurried and harried world, rest needs more prioritisation. Adequate rest enables your body to switch from a state of fight-and-flight to rest and repair. It signals to your body that it is safe and satiated, that nothing externally needs to be done so work on maintaining and healing your internal systems can take place. Thus, for healing any kind of illness, including Type 1 Diabetes, rest is compulsory. It’s a non-negotiable.

When you rest, your parasympathetic nervous system is activated. The parasympathetic nervous system is the branch of the autonomic nervous system that is responsible for the rest and repair of your body. We want this one in action as much of the time as possible. Our resting facilitates this branch.

The Discomfort Of Rest

The thing is… I feel guilty every time I rest. As a wife, mother, homemaker, blogger, friend… I always feel like there is more I need to be doing. I can’t seem to give myself permission to rest until everything else is done. Sitting down on the sofa surrounded by the mess of an unfinished tidy-up is just not something I can do with ease.

I suspect that my inability to just sit down is rooted in my nervous system too. My twitchiness, my desire to always move and ‘do’ seems indicative of a fight-or-flight reaction. If you’re being stalked through the trees by a predator (or your body thinks that’s the case), you’re not just going to kick back and stargaze, are you?!

For a long time, my self-esteem and my self-worth, even feeling that I existed at all, came from what I did in my day. I guess you could say my raison d’être was ‘I do therefore I am’. If I had ticked jobs off my to-do list, accomplished a lot, I felt I had earned the rest. This old trauma response is ingrained. I need to learn to honour my need for rest. I need to learn to sit with myself in that moment, just as I am. I think trauma takes you away from an ability to sit with yourself in any form – mentally, physically, emotionally, or spiritually. Sitting down and just being, rather than doing, is necessary for my healing now.

This may sound counterproductive but, for now at least, I’ve put relaxation on my to-do list! It’s now one of my daily tasks. I’m going to have to condition my body back into the idea of relaxation. It feels a bit like the starting stages of meditation. You know how it is… That first time you meditate, you try so, so hard to stop thinking that you spend all your time thinking about how you shouldn’t be thinking…!!

Returning Home

I have now started to rest. But it’s painful. Yes, that’s right. I struggle to rest. But it’s getting easier. I am saying no to that extra task (or ten extra tasks). I am ensuring I have a whole day each week with no agenda items. I am also taking naps in the sun. I am taking time to read a rubbish book. I have dug out old jigsaws that I haven’t done for years. Most importantly, I am taking the time out to show my body that I am not fighting anymore and it doesn’t need to either.

Now that I live in the Middle East, I am finding myself in a country with a slower pace of life. People don’t rush here. Things happen, things may not happen. Someone may drop by, they may not. And all is good. As I reflect back on how fast-paced my life used to be, it reminds me of a conversation I had with a friend not long after moving out here. He kindly provided some feedback to my driving style. He explained that I was switching lanes too fast when on the motorway (a pace that would be considered perfectly normal in the UK!). He said that local drivers wouldn’t anticipate my ‘quick’ lane changes and that I was therefore more at-risk for an accident. I had to train myself to indicate for longer and transition over the white line at a much slower pace. It has taken time, but I move more slowly now. I hover and pause as I cross the line. I have allowed my car to flow at pace with the cars around me. And now I am encouraging my body and mind to do the same.

Sleep

I am still having some struggles with sleep. Don’t get me wrong… When I’m in bed, I’m usually out like a light. But it takes me a long time to get up those stairs to my bedroom. I procrastinate or, as my husband would say, Dilly and Dally come out to play! I think there are a few reasons for this. Firstly, the godforsaken Netflix. It still sucks me in, despite my best efforts. The combination of the blue light it produces plus the never-ending jump to the next episode makes it hard to switch off. Secondly, there is also a desire to “just get one more thing done” before I get to bed. That is the trauma response. The need to justify rest. The need to persuade myself it’s safe enough, everything is safe enough in my world, for me to go to sleep.

Andrew Weil, in his book ‘Spontaneous Healing’, argues for the importance of rest in healing. I completely agree with him. However, his discussion of rest focuses solely on sleep. Whilst I agree that sleep is important (see my post on sleep here!), I think rest needs to extend beyond that, into the waking hours of life too.

I have two dogs. I believe that they are incredible role models in the way that I should live my life. Being creatures of the wild (their grandmother was a wild-born dog), they have not been influenced by the modern world, by Netflix and to-do lists. And they sleep. They rest. Their meals and exercise are provided as required. So, the rest of their time, they sleep and rest. They play. They enjoy belly rubs. They don’t feel the slightest need to do anything more than that. And they’re happy.

Extending Rest

I recently discovered Matthew Edlund’s book on ‘The Power of Rest’. He outlines a 30-day plan for effecting rest in your life. Whilst the plan itself did not call to me (why rest for 30 days only?!), what did stay with me was the five different types of rest that he stated are needed in our lives. These are: sleep, physical rest, mental rest, social rest and spiritual rest. Matthew Edlund outlines various activities that fall under each of these headings, including meditation, power naps, walking with a friend and so on. For this content alone, I think this book is wholly worthwhile.

Going forward from here, I feel that I need to dedicate some time to considering how to percolate rest, in all its forms, throughout my days. Activities such as gratitude, breathing, yoga, meditation and laughter as forms of relaxation are likely to be content in future posts!

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Natalie Leader

Natalie is a blogger with Type 1 Diabetes. Natalie's special gifts are questioning the status quo and being a rebel. She is using these gifts to question medical 'knowledge' and find a true cure for Type 1 Diabetes.

Bedtime Routine

A Better End To The Day For Better Healing

Summary: Previously resisting structure, the author has finally embraced a bedtime routine for healing. Yoga stretches, skincare, dental care, hydration, gratitudes, and prayer now anchor her evenings. Planning the next day ensures productivity without stress. Fiction reading and experimenting with sound frequencies add relaxation. Candlelight aids skincare, all in pursuit of restful sleep and holistic healing.

The Bedtime Routine. I don’t know why I have resisted this concept for such a long, long time. It could be that it’s because I’m a night owl. I love those deeply quiet and restful hours of the early morning when the world is asleep and peaceful. Or it could be because, as a parent, those few hours after the little ones are asleep seem so short and so full of possibility.

Whatever the reason, I resisted and resisted giving my evening hours to something as structured as a ‘routine’. It felt onerous and long-winded and, well, just hard work at the end of a long day. But I knew that it was a brilliant time to be working on healing, rather than my total number of accumulated telly hours, so I took the plunge. And, as is my way, I went at it with full force…!

Designing My Bedtime Routine

I considered many options for my bedtime routine. Audiobooks, reading, baths (with or without essential oils, epsom salts and all other kinds of healing products), hydration, reflections on my day, gratitudes, affirmations, yoga, stretching, journalling, diffusing essential oils, facial cleansing routines, drinking herbal teas and so on…!

I started to realise that, if I didn’t narrow down my to-do list, I would actually still be awake in the early hours of the morning but, this time, it would be because I was still slogging through my bedtime routine! I decided to trust my intuition on this and go with what I felt drawn towards. Some things jumped out at me immediately…

Yoga Stretches (10 Minutes)

I felt some yoga stretches before bed sounded great. I love yoga and always feel restored and relaxed after spending some time on the mat. However, it’s something I only seem to do sporadically these days so the idea of incorporating that into a daily routine ticked both boxes. So yoga was in.

Cleanse, Tone And Moisturise (5 Minutes)

My appearance, and more importantly how I feel about my appearance, has become more important to me over the preceding months. I have never really invested in my skin and have always found beauty regimes to be too much effort for too little output. But a simple cleansing and moisturising routine felt doable. So that made the list.

Brush And Floss Teeth (5 Minutes)

Of course, dental hygiene goes without saying! I would like to have teeth when I get to old age and diabetics are at increased risk for a whole host of dental problems, including being more prone to gum disease. As part of my intention to reduce toxins in my life, I considered using herbal toothpaste. I actually started this and bought a well-known brand. However, within three months of using this, I was found to have my first ever filling. Perhaps coincidence, perhaps not. But I didn’t want to risk any more problems so I’ve scrubbed that idea and gone back to standard toothpaste. So… Teeth brushing (with a standard toothpaste!), check. Flossing, check.

A Glass Of Water (1 Minute)

Hydration. So, as you know, I now live in an extremely hot desert climate so hydration is on my mind at all hours! I never used to drinking water at night because it often disrupted my sleep due to much needed loo break. However, out here, I am now waking up each morning feeling very thirsty and that doesn’t create a good bodily environment for healing. A glass of water is now part of my night-time ritual.

Gratitudes (5 Minutes)

I tried to make a gratitude practice part of my morning routine but I struggled to name lots of things I was grateful for when I’d just staggered out of bed! I always seemed able to remember to be grateful for my sleep but that was about it!! I hope that, by making this part of my evening routine, I will be able to reflect on my day and all the wonderful moments in it. I hope it will therefore strengthen and deepen my gratitude practice. For now, I will start with three gratitudes every night.

Prayer (1 Minute)

How much did I resist prayer in my life?? Wow, it has hardcore! For years, I didn’t want to pray to a god that I felt had cursed me with diabetes. I didn’t feel He/She deserved as much as a hello from me! I think that the addition of prayer into my night-time routine shows just how far I have come on my healing journey already. I don’t have any set format for praying. I just treat it as a time for me and God to talk, for me to say whatever’s on my mind and, when I can, offer gratitude for all that He/She has done for me and given me.

Plan For The Next Day (18 Minutes)

i have been getting more into self-development lately and I have heard again and again the phrase ‘those who fail to plan, plan to fail’. I don’t know how much that is true but I do know that, on the days that I have made a plan for my time, I get a whole lot more done than on the days when I don’t plan. So planning is in there. But please note that this is not an all-out plan-every-minute kind of thing. It’s more ‘these are the things I want to get done and what is the best order I can do it in’. If I plotted every minute of my day, I dissolve into a stress heap when I got five minutes behind schedule. That isn’t good for creating a stress-free environment for my healing to take place!

Reading Fiction (15 Minutes)

Ah, reading! I love reading!! I have found that, as my healing journey continues, I seem to be devoting more and more of my time to reading factual books about healing. Consequently, less and less of my time is devoted to reading fiction. I feel the balance between work and play is important in life so time needs to be made for enjoyment and relaxation. Reading fiction answers this call for me. Moreover, a gentle story sets me up well to drift off into the land of nod so I have added 15 minutes of reading fiction to my plan.

Finishing Touches

Once I’d worked out what I wanted to include in my bedtime routine, I then had to figure out how long to allocated to each item (see above). I didn’t want to spend more than an hour on my routine so I allocated that hour according to how long I felt each activity would realistically take. I might have to adjust as time goes on.

Then, the last thing to do was decide the order of the activities. I decided I would start in my bathroom as this was the furthest from my bed. That meant doing my ‘cleanse, tone and moisturise face’ and ‘brush and floss teeth’ first. I followed those with my yoga stretches in my bedroom, since these needed to be completed before I could get into bed. Then, from the comfort of my bed, I chose to plan my day first. I knew that this activity would wake my brain up a bit and I needed to save some more calming, less engaging activities for after that. I therefore follow my planning with my glass of water, gratitudes and prayer. I complete the routine with reading my fiction book for fifteen minutes and then turn the light off. Job done! Night night, sleep well.

A Couple Of Extra Things

You might have noticed that I have added candlelight to my skincare routine and sound frequencies to my yoga stretches. The reason for the candlelight is due to something I read in the book ‘Sleep by Nick Littlehales’. He discusses the importance of avoiding bright light on the run-up to bedtime. I really recommend that book if you need to improve the quantity and/or quality of your sleep!

The reason for the sound frequencies is a little less delineated in my mind. I have been hearing great things about the healing qualities of sound frequencies and so I have started to experiment with solfeggio frequencies. Because of the link diabetes has to past trauma and the solar plexus chakra, I am focussing on the frequency of 417 Hz. At the moment, the only time I play solfeggio frequencies is during these ten minutes that I’m doing my bedtime yoga poses. But it’s a start!

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Natalie Leader

The Beauty of Rest

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Bedtime Routine

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